Sassy senior wisdom
Awards season officially kicked off this week with the release of the Oscar nominations. Besides the obvious snubs and surprises, my favorite thing about Oscar season is seeing the complete list of nominated films. Though I can proudly say that I’ve seen the likes of “The Hurt Locker,” “Avatar,” and “Inglourious Basterds”, I have missed “The Messenger,” “The Last Station,” “Crazy Heart,” and the majority of the foreign film and documentary nominees. While I would like to use my column as a soapbox from which I can shout out my 10 best list of the year’s films, I can’t because I haven’t seen all of the films I should see before making a bold list such as that. Instead, I’ll host my own mini-award ceremony with awards based around the movies I’ve seen this year.
My award for “Most Adorable Handling of the Global Financial Crisis” goes to “Confessions of a Shopaholic.” This cute romantic comedy follows the extravagant and costly misadventures of Rebecca Bloomwood, an accidental finance columnist. Rebecca uses shopping as a metaphor to explain smart budgeting and good spending habits to the masses, but she is the last person to take her own advice. Drowning in debt, Rebecca hides from her ever mounting debt at the expense of her credit and her relationships. Though I am not drowning in debt (yet, thanks Concordia), the movie teaches some valuable lessons about spending and self-confidence.
The next award for “Best Adaptation of a Book Based on a Blog about a Cookbook” goes to “Julie and Julia.” Being that the title of this award is so limiting and it is such a specific award, I don’t think any other films qualify.
Nevertheless, “Julie and Julia” is a charming film that is definitely worth checking out for all of the warm fuzzies and culinary inspiration it will give you.
My award for “Best Use of 3-D Technology” goes to “My Bloody Valentine 3-D.” This may seem like a controversial choice to some, being that “Avatar” singlehandedly revolutionized 3D technology and is now sweeping award circuits, but hear me out. “Avatar” would still be enjoyable in 2-D, though much of the grandeur and effect would be lost. “My Bloody Valentine 3-D,” on the other hand, has to be seen in 3-D, it demands it. Without bloody arms dripping blood ON you, shot guns panning the audience, and hatchets flying at you at any given moment, the film would be gross and a waste of time. In 3-D, it is GROSS and SCARY because everything is flying at you! I really hope the sarcasm of my sentiments translate to you, dear reader. If not, parody turns into idiot real fast.
The award for “Megan Fox’s Best Role to Date” goes to the film “Jennifer’s Body.” In the dark comedy, Fox plays a teenager who becomes a blood sacrifice for an indie rock band trying to acquire fame and glory through a demonic ritual.
Because Jennifer is not actually a virgin, the ceremony goes wrong and she becomes a demon with an insatiable appetite for teenage boys. Only her friend Needy can stop her before she eats all the boys in her school. The script, by “Juno”-screenwriter Diablo Cody, is an interesting blend between comedy and horror and Fox balances the material nicely, all very tongue-in-cheek, of course. When she is not running from ridiculously computer generated robots in Egypt, Ms. Fox shows that she can act. I’m not saying that she is a young Meryl Streep. I just give her credit for making Cody’s wordy, slang ridden dialogue sound authentic.
The final award of the column goes to “The Blind Side” for “Best Inspirational Sports Movie Featuring Sandra Bullock.” Much like the award presented to “Julie and Julia” earlier, I think the title of the award may be a bit limiting, but I digress.
In the film, Sandy B (she is my dear friend and I have her permission to call her that, just kidding) plays a rich, outspoken southern matriarch. She is kind and loving and tremendously protective of her family. When her youngest son befriends Michael, a shy but intimidating teenager from the other side of town, Sandy B encourages their friendship and brings him into her home off the streets. Michael has a talent for football and Sandy B challenges the boy to do his best on the field and in school. With Sandy B’s love and guidance, Michael becomes a member of the family and gets drafted by the NFL. It doesn’t get more inspirational than Sandra Bullock and the NFL draft, now does it?
Be sure to check out these award winning films on DVD and Blu-Ray or in theatres and keeping looking for more Sassy Senior Wisdom.
